Its been a while

Where have I been?

School. Now I am not making excuses for myself. I have been busy with life and blogging has not been a priority for me right now. I always seem to add too much at the beginning of the year. School, work, blogging, running, friends, etc. The lists never seem to end. Why do I do this to myself? I feel the need to do everything and then I start to lose energy.

The reason I wanted to blog today was to write about letting things go. I always think of the frozen song “Let It Go” for some reason. (Sorry if that song is now stuck in your head.) For myself, I sometimes think that I let things go but my mind constantly goes back to it. I become frustrated with it swirling around in my head. I guess I still continually have this idealistic view of my life instead of letting it go and understanding that I can’t control what happens, the only thing I can control are my actions towards it. I still get frustrated that I will mess up and make mistakes. But I have to make mistakes! I am human. I am an imperfect human. That statement gives me relief because I know that if I am an imperfect human then I will make mistakes and its still okay. I think we always need a little reminder that we are all imperfect humans but that we can trust God to help us up, to dust us off when we fall down.

I know that in my life, these are the moments that I can say I am growing in my faith. Taking little baby steps because God is the most patient father and He knows each one of us. If you aren’t hearing encouragement/conviction in your life, its not from God. He loves us and always will.

Thoughts on a page

Today’s post is going to be a random off the top of my head post. Sometimes I will try and plan out my post so that there is a format to it or that people will like it. The truth for starting my blog not to have structured posts but just my thoughts out on a page that people can read my post and relate to what I am saying, connecting with each other.

My mind goes through so many thoughts throughout the day. Some can be positive happy thoughts, while other thoughts are negative. They can even been neutral random thoughts not making any sense at all. I can always get caught up in my head and analyse what I am thinking. Why do I think these thoughts? What does it mean when I think this way? Sometimes thinking about what I am thinking about can consume me. I become exhausted in my own thoughts wondering if others think this way. I try and stay in the moment but when my thoughts go on a tangent I can become lost and sidetracked.

When I don’t do my devotions in the morning or pray to God I notice even more so how my thoughts become consumed about myself. Intentionally being in the moment and listening to what people are actually saying is something that I strive to work on each day. Yes, it is always a good thing to process what they are saying but LISTEN to them. God didn’t just make one human in the world, he made nations full of people. He made us to live in community. He wants us to talk and LISTEN to one another. Whenever I am in community with other Christians, I have peace and joy in my heart. We can rely on each other and help each other in our walk with Jesus. I use to compare myself with others in their faith. I thought that there was a ladder that you had to climb to be the best Christian out there. This is false. Just like everyone has different gifts, we all have different fruits. We can choose to stay silent and let the devil win or we can speak life into people. Share our trials and our triumphs. When you open up to others, it gives them an invitation to do the same.

Going back to school

My Friday fave this week is…

Getting to go back to University!!

I have always done well at school because I wanted good grades. To get A’s or B’s in school was a good thing and most of the kids strive to get them. When I went into University the first time I was very confused. It was nothing like high school at all but in my mind I associated it with high school. I did my work, got good grades and graduated. Near the end of my first year of University I just wanted to get out of there and get a job in my field. I didn’t pray about continuing my education at University, I just made my decision about what I want to do and followed through with it.

Fast forward about a few years later and I am back at school. Why would I go back to University? This time I feel ready to go back. I have prayed about it immensely. I have talked with family members about it and have the support from them. In my heart, I know God wants me to do this. Sometimes I have doubted Him. This was not an easy choice to decide. I would go back and forth in my head weighing out the pros and cons of both situations. I would hesitate about going back to school because I would “worry” about my bills not getting paid or not having enough money to pay for tuition.  I would get these negative thoughts in my head about how I am not that smart to be going back to school. These thoughts were so absurd but I would still believe them!

The verse that got me to jump back into the scary University pond was Matthew 6:25-34 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what will you wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life…” God takes care of the birds and animals yet I can’t trust Him to take care of me? He created me. He knows how my brain works and how I think. He knows the choices that I am going to make (good or bad) before I make them. I need to trust Him in my life now and in the future.

They say when God closes a door that He opens a window. Later on if He doesn’t want me pursuing school anymore, He will give me another path to follow. I know it may seem easier to say than to do but I believe that if we pursue Him every morning, everyday, every moment, He will give us some of His light in our troubles to help us through. We just have to make it through, and we will with His help.

What are some areas of your life that you need to give up to God? Are you giving Him some of your time in the morning or any time of day?

Discipline and Training

“No discipline seems pleasant at the time, put painful. Later on, however it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.”  Hebrews 12:11

Having discipline in life is difficult. People want things to happen now with no training or work to get them where they need to be. I know that in my life discipline is very hard for me. This year has been an eye opening experience. I have had to work on discipline a lot more in my life.

I have always wanted to run a 5k or 10k but I have never looked into anything. I was chatting with my friend one lovely evening and she informed me that she signed up for a half marathon! I was quite impressed that she signed up to run a half marathon. She encouraged me to sign up for a 10k. I thought to myself that I MAY sign up for a 5k because I could probably run it just fine but NO WAY could I run a 10k. Throughout that whole week I could not stop thinking about signing up for a 10k. Could I actually run a 10k? Would I be able to make it? It was much more of a challenge than a 5k would be. I convinced myself that I could run a 10k so after a couple more days of thinking it over I signed up for a 10k!

I am so excited for it! I know that I have to be dedicated and disciplined in my training so that I can make it through my run. I haven’t felt like I have had an exciting challenge in my life and I know that signing up for the run makes me accountable so I will succeed!

God wants us to have discipline in our lives. He wants us to live full lives with boundaries and knowing that we can control ourselves. I hope that this discipline in my running will spread to other areas of my life that need more discipline also. Are there areas in your life that God has asked you to be trained better in? Does He want you to have more discipline in your life?

Have a great week!

Would you like to hear more about training for my 10k? Leave a comment or like this blog.

My Friday Faves #2

Wow! I cannot believe that it is Friday again! Time seem to go by quite fast for me this week!

Ok let’s get into my Friday faves!

1. A new year! You get a new start and I always feel refreshed every time the new year comes.

2. Running. I signed up for a 10km run at the end of May. I never loved running when I was in high school but as I got older I started to enjoy it. I can go for a run and just empty my head.

3. The weekend! Even though with my job I have to work on the weekends, I still do enjoy the weekends. I think it is a mindset for me.

4. Snow! It snowed today where I live but it didn’t stick around. I do not like driving in it but when there is fresh snow on the ground it is so beautiful. I do hope it snows this year!

Have a great week!

New Years Resolutions

As the end of the year approaches I start thinking about the next year and ALL the resolutions that I can make. The past couple of years I haven’t made any resolutions because I honestly did not want to break them all by the end of the month. This year I have a better mindset of what I want goals I want to set. They have to be reachable because if the goals become too complicated, then I will forget about them.

I have decided to put them on my blog as a reminder to myself. In a month or even next year if I achieve even one of my resolutions, I will be happy with myself. That is what the resolutions have to be. Progress. Growth. Something that has changed you even a little bit for the better.

Here are my resolutions:

1. Spend more intentional/relationship time with Jesus. Being a christian isn’t a religion, it is a relationship with Jesus. I want Him to become my close friend, rather than someone I run to when I become overwhelmed.

2. Have a regular exercise routine. (Isn’t this on everyone’s new years resolutions?) I want to workout at least three times a week. I signed up for a 10k run at the end of May so this resolution will be important for me to do well in my run.

3. Spend my time wisely A.K.A not procrastinating. I am starting school again this next month so I need to make sure that I have all my assignments and readings done. Procrastination for me is a BIG one. I know when I procrastinate and even though it bothers me, I continue to do it. I put too many items on my plate and when it gets too full I ignore it instead of taking some items off.

4. Make my bed everyday! Sometimes the simplest ones are the hardest!

5. Cook more meals at home. Practice cooking with some new recipes and find some healthy staple recipes to cook with. This is a difficult one because I usually cook for myself and have a lot of leftovers. I want to enjoy cooking more instead of it being such a chore for me.

6. Set a Budget. This will be the first time that I will be going to school and not living at home so there are a lot more expenses this next year. When I make money I tend to spend it pretty quick instead of putting it away. I want to be able to still make money while I am at school. That can work, right?

There we have it! Five attainable resolutions that I will work towards in the new year! What are some of your new years resolutions? Or do you skip the resolutions? Happy 2015!

Trying something new! My Friday Faves

I have been trying to figure out what to write about for three weeks now. I think it has been difficult for me to write something because I was busy getting ready for Christmas. (Now I am just making excuses. I was blog surfing around and I saw that people were writing about their favourite things on Friday so that I what I am going to start doing every Friday.

Let’s get started shall we?

My Friday Faves!

1. Chunky knit infinity scarves!

Where I live it gets really cold (well not really but I do get cold in the winter time). These scarves are so stylish yet keep me warm. I love them so much!!

2. Adult Onesies!

Keeping with the warm theme! I seriously love onesies! I only have one right now (haha I am so funny!) I like the ones that don’t have the feet with them that way I can wear slippers with them.

3. Christian Non fiction books.

I just got The meaning of Marriage: by Timothy Keller and Prayer: by Timothy Keller for Christmas this year. I haven’t read them but I heard good things about them. I also love Joyce Meyer. She is just an amazing lady and any of her books are a great read.

4. Podcasts

My church has a podcast and when I can’t make it to church then I can listen to the sermons. Also Joyce Meyer has a podcast that is great and Focus on the Family is always a good go to podcast and they are only thirty minutes long.

5. INSTAGRAM!!

I have always enjoyed Instagram but I still love it! It can never get old for me. Follow me on Instagram @l@lindseyh510lindseyh510

Hope you enjoyed my favourites! What are some of your favourites? Any from this list?

Back to Blogging!

I am back with another blog post! November just flew and I am very excited to be blogging again.

I love the month of December, other than it being cold here. Christmas is on its way and that makes me very excited! Now before I moved out of my parents home, Christmas was not my favourite time of year. I did NOT like Christmas music, or decorations until later on in December. I do not know why I was so against it when I lived at home.

When I moved out a few years ago, I got so excited! There is something about Christmas that just makes me smile now. I think that now that I have a place of my own to decorate and that I do not live with more of my family, I cherish the time when we do see each other. Thanksgiving, Christmas, birthdays! Those are the times when we all get together again.

What is your favourite time holiday? Do you get to spend it with your loved ones? Make sure you cherish the times you have with your family, especially when you live at home because time goes quickly. Hug your family today or tell them you love them! They never will get tired of hearing it from you!

Just getting started, but taking a break.

Last week I was full steam ahead on blogging two days a week! I had so many ideas rolling around in my head and I could not get them down on paper fast enough.

Then life got a little busier and I kept on forgetting my ideas or I wouldn’t feel like writing them down. I was tired and I jumped onto blogging way to fast. I thought more about number of views than people sitting at their computer reading my thoughts on the internet. I was becoming obsessed! I become obsessed a lot, especially with new things that are around me. I never thought of myself as the type of person to become obsessed with anything but the more that I think about the past, the more I see the obsessive behaviors.

If you have read my last post, you already know that I am a perfectionist. Obsession and perfectionism go hand in hand. I get excited about a new fad or object, get all these crazy ideas in my head, then I want to do it all perfectly with the scenario that I have already composed in my head. But life does NOT work that way. I should have that figured out by now. I am the person who is still banging their head with a mallet despite it hurting but I can not seem to stop myself because maybe if I hit it on the side of my head instead of the front, it will hurt less than hitting it on the front of my head. Can anyone relate to that?

So rather posting this on Monday, I thought I would post it today because I am trying to break out of my perfectionist ways. I will not be posting anymore blogs for a month. I feel that God wants me to step away from technology. I have been too heavily reliant on my phone and computer and not spending time in prayer and devotions with Him. Taking this month off should get me back to why I started writing these in the first place, not for the numbers but even if it is just for that one other person reading my blog and relating to what the words on this page. Let me ask you one question before I go, are you listening to God when He is talking to you, or are your idols blocking His words from reaching you?

Hope to be back in a month!

Being a Perfectionist

Now if you have read my first post called starting… you will have your warm beverage and your cozy blanket ready before you dive into reading this post.

I have a little bit of a problem, because I am a perfectionist. I get these thoughts in my head which seem like a great idea in the beginning and everything flows “perfectly”  but then when I actually pursue any of the thoughts, things usually go haywire! For example, I thought it was a great idea to start a blog! You write some random things on a page and everyone on the internet reads your blog and becomes inspired. Of course it doesn’t work this way. My mind has a way of taking all the negative out of my crazy ideas so it is like a fairy tale is going on inside my head 24/7. I had no idea how hard it was to start a blog! I mean you have to make sure that you know HOW to write, then you have to find people to read your blog and share your thoughts on other social media pages, which some people will not enjoy reading your blog because they have different ideas/ beliefs that you.  I thought that blogging would be very private because I could hide behind my laptop and type some words on a page. But it is not private at all, and that is a good thing. I have been reading other people’s blogs for a while now and I have seem to notice that I gravitate towards similar minded people. They have a schedule while blogging, they always look put together, they seem to have all of their ducks in a row. But then I read a random deep post about how it is all just a facade, a cover that they are hiding behind so that their life looks good on the outside but they have this feeling of struggle inside of them. I love those posts because I relate to them so much and I don’t feel like I have to work so hard at everything or be perfect because the reality is no person is perfect. I am grateful when people are open with how they truly are because it shows that we can’t fully rely on them, we can only rely on God.

I am not calling myself a blogging expert, I am not perfect, I will mess up but I am grateful right now in this moment. I love blogging so far and I hope to write on a blogging schedule and have one post on Monday and one post on Thursday, although I may write more, I may write less. I am working on being less of a perfectionist.